You Are Always on My Mind, Karma!

Here I am, sitting at my computer after a very long day at work and an even longer week, trying to reflect on what impacted me the most. Karma has been on my mind, and I feel it's time to explore this thought.

I'm doing a bit of free writing, as I haven't fully formed the idea in my head. I'm attempting to approach this subject with grace, staying in what Ted Lasso would call the "no-schadenfreude zone." It's important to be graceful when witnessing the world's magical karma correcting an injustice. For your own sanity, you must not let darkness consume your compassion or rejoice in someone else's pain, even if they once hurt you.

This reflection comes from an event years ago—one of the most hurtful experiences I've encountered in my life. When it happened, I was in such shock that I couldn't process the moment. My immediate response was to do what I knew best: blame myself.

But I now understand that it wasn't my fault that someone couldn't appreciate my efforts. However, I am responsible for not establishing clearer boundaries when they disrespected me. It was one of those moments where you tell yourself, "I thought I knew them."

Years have passed, and karma, as it often does, has a way of returning pain to its source. I find myself wishing that, like flashbacks in movies, they could remember the moment that sparked this cycle and understand why they're experiencing similar hurt.

You might wonder: Does this take away the pain they caused? No, not entirely. But I find solace in knowing that they now understand how I felt. If there's a shred of decency within them, the shame of realizing the pain they've inflicted might be punishment enough. Some breaks are irreparable—like dishes shattered beyond the Japanese art of kintsugi, turning to dust under the weight of a powerful blow.

Sometimes I wish I were a better person, capable of releasing the grudges that weigh heavy in my heart. But I'm not there yet. A part of me still finds comfort in karma's potential for balance. And to be clear—I'm not celebrating their pain. I'm simply acknowledging that they now understand the hurt they caused. That's all; as simple as that.