On Intermezzo: A Journey Through Grief and Acceptance
In recent years, Sally Rooney has slowly but steadily become one of my favorite authors. Her writing style, like the subject matters she chooses, is a bit unconventional and brings a challenge you might not have necessarily prepared for—but one you find yourself navigating the moment you pick up one of her books.
Of those I’ve read so far, Conversations with Friends remains my absolute favorite. Normal People was the one that moved me the most, but Conversations with Friends is the one I keep close to my heart. I’ve just finished reading her latest book, Intermezzo.This isn’t a formal review—just my reflections on how the story affected me and what I took away from it.
The title, Intermezzo, means "in between" in Italian, which fits beautifully for this story about people caught between different life stages and even between each other’s lives. The story revolves around two brothers, Peter and Ivan, who have just lost their father after a long struggle with cancer. It depicts how grief can root itself into people’s lives, sometimes without them even realizing, and linger until it takes over, making you forget who you were before you fell through all this darkness.
Intermezzo is, above all, about acceptance—a precious trait that, if we were all more generous with, would make life on this messy planet so much easier. It’s a sad, painful story about the torture of loving someone and being loved back, even when neither knows quite how to fit into each other’s world. It captures the complexity of sibling relationships as they each cope with grief in their own ways, alongside the fear of missing out on a life far shorter than we tend to believe. This story drains the pit of your stomach yet fills your heart in equal measure.
Rooney’s books make you question who came up with all these rigid rules on how society should function and how people should feel. In her world, it’s not only normal but perfectly acceptable to have deep feelings for more than one person, as long as those involved find a way to accept each other. This isn’t a free pass to hurt others but an exploration of a world where it’s okay to love multiple people at different stages in life and be at peace with it. Relationships are hard, people are messy, heartbreaks are cruel—but it’s life.
It doesn’t always work, but I do my best. See what happens. Go on in any case, living.
This is how the book ends, encapsulating its essence: you have to do the best you can with the hand you’re dealt. Instead of wasting the potential of a life well-lived, embrace what might seem unconventional and crazy to others. Be true to yourself, honest with the people you love, and you’ll find those who accept you for who you are, not who they want you to be. Here’s to the beauty of living vicariously through stories! Here’s to you, Sally Rooney!